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Lars Von Trier: Fear of flying, depression

July 23, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Lars Von Trier interview: Season in hell

 

Published Date: 12 July 2009

IF Lars von Trier hoped to find salvation in Antichrist, his critics had other ideas. The Dogme director tells James Mottram why chaos still reigns despite overcoming severe depression to try to resurrect his career

LARS von Trier is not a well man. As the sign painted in blood-red lettering on his office door says, “Chaos Reigns”. Jittery, nervous and unsettled, the 53-year-old Dane even jumps when his mobile phone rings midway through our interview.

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And there’s no question that Von Trier has a lot of fear and anxiety. Among his multiple phobias, his fear of flying means every time he makes a pilgrimage to Cannes film festival, he drives for five days from Denmark in a battered old camper van. 

This time, he arrived with the festival’s most talked-about film, Antichrist. Despite Cannes being his spiritual home – he won the Palme d’Or there in 2000 for his musical Dancer In The Dark, starring Björk – the film’s first press screening caused uproar, a mix of jeers and nervous laughter. Billed as Von Trier’s attempt at gothic horror, the film sees Willem Dafoe and Charlotte Gainsbourg retreat to a cabin in the woods to heal their psychological wounds after their young son fell to his death from an open window. What follows is a gruelling odyssey, as Gainsbourg’s unnamed mother becomes increasingly hysterical, turning on her husband – and herself – in a brutal last half-hour. 

In the press kit, in what he called the “director’s confession”, Von Trier dubs Antichrist “the most important film of my entire career”. The reason is quite simple: his depression had left him unable to work. Six months into his illness, he wrote a script as a cathartic exercise – “as a test to see if I would ever make another film”. Still, he was listless, completing the screenplay with little enthusiasm, adding scenes and images – often culled from dreams – with no concern for logic. Dubbing it “a glimpse into the dark world of my imagination, into the nature of my fears”, what spilled out onto the page was anything but pretty. 

Ironically, the end result is one of Von Trier’s most style-conscious films since the days of his early works Europa and The Element Of Crime. Take the bravura opening black-and-white sequence as Dafoe and Gainsbourg copulate in slow motion. It’s a far cry from the back-to-basics aesthetic of his Dogme95 manifesto, when Von Trier (who made 1997’s The Idiots under its so-called Vow of Chastity) urged filmmakers to shoot films on handheld cameras in natural lighting with no special effects. 

Nevertheless, Von Trier, who wanted to merge a documentary-like style with more “monumental” shots, was unhappy with the end results. “I don’t think I really succeeded,” he moans.

The closest we get to a laugh in Antichrist is when a fox – eating its own entrails no less – turns to the camera and repeats Von Trier’s office door slogan, “Chaos Reigns”. “As you know, I work very much from humour,” he says. “And we know that this (a talking fox] is a horror killer, but on the other hand, the fox demanded a line – so what can you do?” 

By the time Von Trier arrived in Cannes – infuriating one Daily Mail journalist in the press conference by refusing to justify the film and instead proclaiming himself “the best director in the world” – chaos did reign. When the film premiered, he left the screening without waiting to receive the applause. “I’m not a stable person,” he shrugs. “I felt quite a lot of hostility in the room, and then a stupid little thing (happened] like a light didn’t go on, and we had to sit there for seven minutes and wait for an endless time. I’m normally a very friendly man but at a certain point I couldn’t take it anymore. Then someone said, ‘People are clapping. If you go, it’s an insult to them.’ And that was enough. I was off!” 

With the film proposing that Gainsbourg’s character is the embodiment of the Antichrist, it once again raises the age-old accusations that Von Trier is a misogynist. Just recall Dogville and Manderlay – the first two parts of his as-yet-incomplete USA trilogy – and the punishments handed out to the character of Grace, played respectively by Nicole Kidman and Bryce Dallas Howard. Certainly, a brief glance at Von Trier’s private life hints at where his problems stem from. Back in 1995 his mother made a deathbed confession that her late husband was not Von Trier’s biological father. Within a year he divorced his first wife and converted to Catholicism (hitherto believing he was Jewish). 

So what made him see woman as the Antichrist? “I am probably not very religious,” he explains. “It’s very obvious to me that religion is something that’s invented by man. So suddenly I saw that the Antichrist would be the woman because she wouldn’t accept the religion that was so typically manmade.” He’s increasingly come to believe he’s an atheist, he says. “I can’t be honest and say to my children (he has four], ‘There is a God.’ It’s not possible.” He lets out a long sigh. “I think you can say that I’m a pessimist. It’s the only thing that has come out of all these years of therapy.”

It’s there for all to see in Antichrist, a Freudian fairytale that’s arguably saved Von Trier. Did he accomplish what he set out to achieve? “It’s a good question,” he says, “but I don’t know. Because of this mental illness, I was not expecting so much. I was just trying very hard to be there physically and finish the film.” With no idea what his next film will be, I’m left with the impression that he still has a long way to go before he’s better. Certainly, the vitriolic reaction to Antichrist in Cannes has shaken him. No wonder he stops short of saying that filmmaking is always therapeutic. “That would be too easy,” he says. “Then I would be really, really healthy after all these films.” 

• Antichrist is released 24 July www.antichristthemovie.com


http://scotlandonsunday.scotsman.com/sos-review/Lars-Von-Trier-interview-Season.5451263.jp

Categories: Celebrities and Mental Health · Portrayals of Mental health · anxiety
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Sunday Panic Attack hangover

June 14, 2009 · Leave a Comment

I slept for a couple of hours after the PA lastnight but woke at 3am and stayed up.

I was on soneone’s couch so couldnt really sleep. In the am I had the use of a bed but the room was too noisy and bright from the road (why do people have flimsy  blinds which let all the light in?).

Anyway I slept til 3 or 4pm nicely rested. Completely against the principles of sleep hygiene…

Went for a nice walk by a canal.

Still have that ‘black cloud hanging at the edges’. The feeling that the blackness is hovering, just waiting to pounce and that anything might bring it on.

I’m still under stress from business worries and responsibility.

Categories: Insomnia/Sleep hygiene · Relaxation · anxiety · panic attacks
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New dread

June 14, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Terrible time tonight whilst watching film (Reign of Fire). Great movie. I watched it round at friend’s house. Suddenlyhalf hour from the end strated feeling strange. I had planned to go home on the bus. I’m sure subject matter didnt help (fear, dragons, death) Would I get this if it had been a comedy. Lately I am stressed though and feel ‘tired’ often like my whole body is tired and achey even though I’ve done nothing physical.

Buzzing feeling in head. I immediately thought of what I had eaten (as I always do) Some beers a good while aho, some chocolate pudding, cup of decaf tea (was it really de-caf?). Disorienation followed.

Nothing was working, I concluded it must be a Panic Attack but as usual it felt different, like it wasn;t ‘panic’ per se . Reminded me of when it first happened (2?) years ago.

Everything seemed ‘echo-y’ things friend said seemed to echo in my consciousness a few seconds later like I delayed processing.

Yawning constantly. I didnt watch the end of film. tried to sleep. Very tired very quickly because of exhaustion (heart racing etc) PAs usually make me v.tired so it gave me some reassurance that it was a PA rather than my usual assumption of food/drink being spiked.

EXTREMELY unpleasant. Luckily I di go to sleep and woke a couple hours later normalised.

It’s now 3am ish.

Someone told me (and I also read somewhere) that TV watching affect sleep even if it doesnt actually eat into your sleep time. Alos I know TV watching late at nigt is bad but this is when they put all the good films on and I havent got a DVD recorder. Musr get one and refuse TV – also PC – after 9pm?

Thought of Linden and Barry method but egging on the PA didnt seem to work, nor did trying to do maths , using higher brain function to override Amygdala (sp) baser brain function. Couldn’t think straight enough to think of anything to do .

Also wsn’t inclined to jump up and down eating apples, I think the weirdness of that would have freaked me out even more than I was!

What helped was just going to sleep aided by the tiredness, getting unconsciousness asap

This rturn of the shit is a setback. Is more to follow.

Categories: Relaxation · Symptoms · Treaments · anxiety · panic attacks
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Dizzy spells again

December 14, 2007 · Leave a Comment

After thinking I was well on the road to recovery – especially after yesterday – I have awoken to dizzy spells accompanying tension/pressure at the base of my skull. Dizziness is one of my most unpleasant side effects and usually renders me hopeless for much of the day.

I went to bed last at 12.30ish in my continuing attempt to regain sleep hygiene/normal sleep pattern. A somewhat fitful night marred by tinnitus. Awoke at 5ish to eat something, watch Captain Scarlett and then go back to sleep on and off til 10ish.  Got up and had tea and toast at mydesk whilst checking emails but I think ‘overthinking’ last night and this morning has got the better of me. I can try and shake this off or I can go back to bed and try and sleep it off. Yawning excessively now.

The ’strain’ of Christmas does help. Arrangements. Visiting relatives in another city etc. I would rather sit this Christmas out, not have to do anything, not have to meet anyone or be sociable and just have a ‘comfort’ Xmas with food and a blanket in front of the telly watching It’s a Wonderful Life. But always the ‘arrangements’ and feeling you either have to travel or be a host. I vote for more selfishness at Chrstmas.

I have a meeting tonight; one which I’ve had significant panic attacks/anxiety before. However I may just not go because I don’t feel like it rather than forcing myself to go for the sake of CBT treatment.

Reading this has just made me feel a lot worse!
Luckily GF is in ‘look after’ mode at the moment (I helped her with a college assignment last night). Wonder how long it will be before she is back to ‘complain’ mode.

Categories: Insomnia/Sleep hygiene · Symptoms · anxiety
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The Return of the Nerves

November 29, 2007 · Leave a Comment

Well, the ‘highstrung’ feeling that has haunted me for months recently went away and I was OK for days at a time. Having no physical symptoms of stress makes a huge difference s to how I’m feeling as I associate these feelings with being ill and they are extrememly unpleasant by themselves even without an ensuing panic attack.

don’t know why they they came back today particularly. Perhaps due to too long spent in front of the PC this afternoon. Plus, I had to ring up a company about a ’prize’ I have won. Needless to say, I was passed around as noone knew much and eventually onto a voicemailk where I left a message. I left the wrong mobile number (leaving out a 0) as I momentarily forgot it.

I’m not particularly looking forward to my prize as it involves a day’s free consultancy when I would rather have cash.

Categories: panic attacks
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