Am I recovered enough to have a normal life ie get a normal job? My sleep pattern is still all over the place; I try to ‘reset’ it every so often but I easily fall out of it again. I always make sure I get as much sleep as possible as it’s a risk factor for panic attacks and anxiety/mental illness generally.

I’m considering how much the GF is a negative influence. Lately, she has been pulling stunts and having the usual moody tantrums that I’m getting sick of. She threw out some personal items of mine recently without permission despite me repeatedly stressing that she should not do this without my say-so. A friend of mine has a similar situation.

Girlfriend swap

As I reported 2 weeks ago , I am getting better. However, I still have my moments, usually when tired or when stressed or both. planned aday out with GF on Sunday. Didn’t have that much sleep , maybe 5 hours. Have been staying over at her flat as it’s like a mini-reak from mine. However, it is also small, claustrophobic and has ‘annoyances’ including her mean behaviour. This included refusing to top up her pre-pay gas meter so the flat gets cold. She has absolutely no reason to have a pre-pay meter; it was there when she mo0ved in and is unnecesarily expensive as the gas company charges you more for gas with one. She is remarkably concerned with the boiler at her flat whereasn she shows no conbcern at all at mine.

Also, major annoyance - SHE DOESN’T LISTEN. About anything. Maybe if she ’respected’ me more she would pay attention but half the shit she goes through is a result of her ignoring advice I have given her. eg the room temperature gauge  which is her preferred method of controlling the boiler along with turning down any know she can lay her hands on.

My fingers have developed an involuntary twitch so naturally I see this as the first stage of MS (Multiple Scelerosis)

My sleep pattern still has not sorted itself out.

I still get anxiety on or before journeys and got major anxiety about facing a train trip up north (trapped in the train for 2 hours each way with the inevitable delay)